HunHan fanfic critique

Hey, so I noticed you all didn't really like my continuation of the HunHan fanfic. Could you guys tell me why you didn't like it and what I can change about it to make it better? Please comment and let me know so that I can make it better for you guys! <3 The post is called HunHan continued (Picks up after I want you LuHan) please read it and if you don't like it tell me why please in the comments!